Step Back
The Lord is my strength and my shield; My heart trusts in Him, and I am helped. Therefore my heart exults, And with my song I shall thank Him. - Psalm 28:7
I've never been praised for my athletic accomplishments. Oh, the guys would come out to view the girls' tennis class when we were in college, but they were looking at the curvaceous legs of the students instead of evaluating their expertise of the game. (We weren't that dumb!) However, after Indian wrestling with all my sons I am pretty proud of my "firm" handshake and I can "horse" the furniture around when I'm ready to rearrange the living room. But that's pretty much the extent of my physical prowess.
All that to say I would definitely doubt my ability to handle a war-worthy shield. It would take strength and agility that I just don't have! Besides that, it's pretty scary. I've imagined what it would be like. I would have to be aware of my enemy's position at all times and pivot rapidly with my shield to protect myself from behind, to the left and to the right. Where is he? Is he behind me? I've lost him! I would have to master the technique of warding off the glancing blows, holding my shield steady and sure when under a frontal attack, and then there's a sword in the picture somewhere. No. That's not one of my strong suits.
That's why I am so very, very thankful for Proverbs 30:5(b): He is a shield to those who take refuge in Him. Relief! Relief! He is my shield! Not to fret. But wait, Anabel, just one minute; there is a condition in that statement: I have to choose to take refuge in Him before He becomes my shield!
That's the hard part. "Thanks, I can do it by myself" was my motto for so many years that to step back and let someone else carry my shield is just not in my comfort zone, and I think it probably takes almost as much practice to learn to "step back" as it would to learn to wield my shield! But there's more. My "Shield" is alert and ever aware of approaching danger when I'm blithely skipping down my yellow brick road very unaware. He protects me at all times and is willing to actually throw Himself in front of me to keep me safe! All of that is mine? How foolish of me to hold on to my pride and my ability! To declare my independence! No. No more. I have made my decision.
Lord, I choose this very moment to surrender to You as my Refuge. I'll step behind and let You be my Shield and my sword, fighting all the battles and planning all the strategies. I've tried and been defeated, left bleeding on the battlefield too many times. I give myself to You. Thank You for being my ever-present powerful Shield.